S-L-O-W

S-L-O-W is how I feel lately.  Summer always slows the pace a little, which is a good thing (usually).

But this summer I found myself moving slower than usual, which lead me to having a surgery I have been putting off for a while.  There was a point where I just had to acknowledge that I wouldn't magically get better without surgery, and I knew that from day one of surgery, I'd be 6 weeks closer to healing...so I did what I had needed to do for while.

The recovery is predicted to be 6 weeks.  I'm at the end of week one.

...Told you this summer was S-L-O-W.

It's slowed down blogging also.  But today when I was mindlessly checking email...facebook...blog (yes, S-L-O-W), I found a new traffic source on my website.

Their button is on my sidebar, so it was familiar, but still I had to check it out...

have kids, will blog

And what do you know?

Our blog was featured on their website a few days ago. 

If you haven't checked out their website, read more about them here.

As I've blogged, I find that I tend to be drawn to the small, authentic networks...seems to be a good fit.

And there you go...a nice feature and one more S-L-O-W day closer to recovery!

More June Birthdays

This is my awesome younger brother, Ben, with his family (stole the picture from facebook...  Thanks Melissa!)  Ben turns forty today.  As his sister, it is my obligation to join all my other sisters in making sure the entire world knows Ben is turning forty today.  I'd be negligent if I didn't say anything.  But I'd also be negligent if I didn't say he could beat any twenty year old on the planet in pull-ups, push-ups, and any other kind of strength contest.  Like one of my sisters said on facebook, "He rocks forty."

But like the other June birthdays in my family, this is a shared one.  

Ben's 6th birthday was interrupted with the birth of another sibling, and just to put into perspective the anticipation this 6 year old was feeling:  

He had four older sisters and two younger sisters.  It was time for a boy.  He knew it.  We all knew it.  God would not give this poor, lone male sibling another sister.  That would be cruel.

We obviously hadn't learned yet that the odds were still 50/50 because when my dad brought news from the hospital it was about another adorable sister:

My parents named her Ruth.  And when Ben saw her tiny, tiny feet he fell in love and forgave God for sending yet another girl.  And at the ripe old age of 9, I took it on myself to fix the awful mistake my parents made in naming her Ruth, and changed her name to "Dolly."  From that point on, she was my dolly.  I dressed her.  I did her hair.  I took her everywhere with me.  (I'm pretty sure I was my mom's favorite child back then.)  

Ruth grew up and married Nick.

They had two adorable girls of their own...DJ (a.k.a. Joie) and Audrey.

If you know us, you know the rest of the story.  

Ruth's birthday is one of those days we remember rather than celebrate...a reminder of the blessing of a great life, but also a day filled with longing for what we've lost.

This year I've noticed Joie is into family history lately.  She loves the idea of knowing the names of ancestors and where she came from, and she loves to hear the stories behind those names.

I've thought about how we "know" our parents, and it's one thing to know them as parents, and quite another to know the stories of their lives that make them real people.

So as a gift for Joie on Ruth's birthday, I emailed family and posted on facebook for those who knew her to send me stories or memories about Ruth that I could pass on to Joie.

The result was a great compilation of stories that even I hadn't heard before.  

What a gift...and a fun way to celebrate the life of Joie's mom.  Thank you, thank you, thank you to those who participated!  (And I got the biggest hug ever from Joie, so I know it was an awesome gift.)

Sunday Sharing

"...The Lord is good to all: and his tender mercies are over all his works”  (Psalms 145:9)


I'm always more aware of this when I'm weak and hurting.  When it seems I can do nothing for myself, and I am in my own mind least deserving of support and love, the Lord responds with an increase of love in the form of strength, peace, understanding, and compassion, that lets me know that He is very aware of me in very individual ways.

I love the idea of "tender mercies" and wanted to share.

Glee Addicts

Megan asked me today why I haven't been blogging lately.  She checked our blog today and there was nothing new.  Surgery was my excuse, but she and I both know the real reason...

I'm now an addict.  A "gleek."

Shamelessly, I've spent the last few days catching up on this television series that others have talked about over the past few years.

The first episode Gabby watched, she said, "That's a dumb show mom.  It doesn't teach you anything."

Sadly, I agreed with her but continued to indulge in my latest addiction, and while the boys have been at scout camp, I've made gleeks out of my girls as well.  I think they didn't shower until 1:00 p.m. today, and even though it was a beautiful day, we spent our morning watching Glee.

The reality is that once I'm no longer recovering from surgery, I won't watch TV.  TV is something I fall asleep to.  I don't watch TV for entertainment.  Tim and I are miles apart on our television viewing habits.  He enjoys TV.  I tolerate it.  Once Tim and I were talking about what we appreciated in each other, and he said, "I loved it the other day when you came downstairs and just sat by me and watched TV."  

When he said it, I was thinking, "Really?  Because I would rather do almost anything, including walking on broken glass before I'd actually want to sit down to watch TV."

And my family would say mostly I'm not very enjoyable to watch TV with, because I'm a pretty intense viewer.  If anyone is talking, or I think I've missed something, it causes me stress.  I've been known to back up TV and movies when watching at home to catch one tiny word or phrase that I think I might have missed...  

Yeah, not exactly a relaxing hobby with me.

So we'll gleek out for the next few days, then we may or may not continue to watch it later...  It is entertaining (if you can't move, and there isn't anything else you can do).

Thank you for the commercial break.  Now back to our regularly scheduled programming (that would be Glee, in case you were wondering).

Back In The Saddle Again

Four years ago Joie lived in Cedar Fort, Utah with her family.  After years of moving around, they had found their home, and settled down as a family.  They kept horses at a neighbor's pasture and Joie and her little sister had started competition riding.

But more than riding, they had found something that united them as a family.  They helped morning and night to care for the horses, and because Joie loved to ride, her mom, Ruth, challenged herself to get over her fear of horses and had started riding as well.

They loved their lifestyle, and enjoyed seeing the girls compete.

On June 30, 2007 Joie won Miss Congeniality at a Cedar Fort Rodeo competition.

Six short weeks later her family was gone.  

After the accident as Joie's body healed, she was able to ride horses again, and we moved her horse to a stable close to our home so she could continue ride him.  That winter, her horse died also.  

After that Joie lost interest in horses.

Once in a while she has asked about riding again, but when it came time to sign up she'd change her mind, and has stuck to exploring other interests.

Earlier this spring I told her about a girl on Gabby's soccer team who rode horses and told her I had the phone number of the instructor.

This time Joie was excited.

Maybe it was because it was a different riding style (English, vs. Western which she had learned previously).

Maybe it was because it was a different place and instructor.

Maybe it was because enough time had passed.

Maybe all the above.

Over the past several weeks she's talked almost every day about riding again.

Today was the big day.

She's back in the saddle again...

"Whoopi-ty-aye-yay, I go on my way, back in the saddle again..."  

Gene Autry


(Photos by Tim who was kind enough to take pictures for me while I'm home recovering from surgery.  I was so sad to miss this day!  And F.Y. I. our court date for finalization is back on for July.)

Sunday Sharing

So many thoughts about Dads on this important day.  I wish I could have done a Father's Day Week series like I did for Mother's Day but there's no way this week would allow that.

My heart is full of love for dads.  My own dad was amazing in that role.  I posted this on facebook:

"My dad had 12 kids and we all still think we're his favorite...and now all his grandkids think the same thing. I love how he loves everyone. He has an amazing heart!"


I believe that love is one of the greatest legacy any parent could leave a child, but there is something special about dads who love.

Our children are also blessed with a dad who has a huge heart, and he has taught our children to love and serve others.  Last December Tim had huge plans for the kids doing community service over their holiday break.  When we knew we'd be bringing home Gabby, his plans didn't change.  I was worried it would overwhelm her, and the back-up plan was for her to stay here at home with me if she didn't want to go.  But in one of our first glimpses of Gabby's energy for life, she didn't even consider staying behind.  Later that day she couldn't stop talking about how good it felt to "help the poor."  What an amazing gift that experience was in her first few days with our family...and if it had been up to the soft-hearted mom, we would have skipped it all because it might have been difficult.

Thank goodness for the wisdom and inspiration of Dad!

Edgar A Guest said, "Be this his praise, if praise be needed.  As a father he succeeded."

No matter the title, salary, or influence in career fields and communities, Dad is the title that lives on forever and ever...  And it's never too late to start!

Six Months Already?

Six months ago we brought this girl home.  Wow.  Time flies.

Last week I talked to the attorney, and pending one more document from the agency, we were talking adoption dates.  He asked me about good times to schedule finalization.  I told him...based exclusively on dates that all of the family would be here at one time during the summer (when you have teens, scout camp, youth conferences, girl's camps, etc. that's rare).  He didn't think it would happen until July, so we settled on a week...the week of Gabby's birthday.  Sweet!

I told Gabby.  She was jumping-out-of-her-skin excited.  (And a little nervous, after all that's what happens when we say "the A word" around here.)

Today we got a letter in the mail.  We are hereby ordered to appear in court on Thursday, June 23rd, for the finalization of our adoption.  

Really?

When my heart should have been soaring it sank.  I have surgery on Monday.  I'll be walking by Thursday...I think.

And on the scheduled day of court, the boys will be doing a back country scouting adventure somewhere in the high mountains of Utah.  

We've waited so long for this it tears me up inside to think of moving this date.  

And I want all of us to be there, which is going to test the limits of what it means to be a family if the date can't be changed.  

If we can't do anything about the date, Tim will be driving two hours to pick the boys up for court, and I'll put on make-up and a smile (and take some good pain meds) and be the happiest mom on the planet.  

For sure we'll figure this out, probably next week.  I'm thinking Tim will get a phone call from the attorney about the time I'm going  under...  

Big sigh.

Beat Summer Boredom

I realize I've bored everyone to death with posts about finding my flip flops, so it's appropriate now to follow up with a post about beating summer boredom, right?

I love my Activity Days Girls.  I told them a few weeks ago that when school is out we'd have an activity roasting s'mores and coming up with a list of Boredom Busters for summer.  They have been so excited about this activity...

Apparently summer boredom doesn't just happen at our house.

S'mores, as promised.

And now for the list:

Each girl brought ideas, and when we put them all together we had three pages of "What to do when you are bored during the summer..."  

One girl called it "my summer schedule."

They were all excited to get started.

I've posted the list as it's own page.  Feel free to borrow, copy, etc.  The ideas certainly aren't original, but when you're bored, a list is definitely helpful.

Happy Feet

Look what found my feet again.

And I noticed when I took the photo they're Rocket Dogs, not Roxy.  Told you the brand wasn't important (see previous post).

Tim found them under the computer desk.  The computer I never use...  Which leaves me wondering who wore my flip flops, but I don't even care because they're back on my feet again.

Wanted: Roxy Black Flip Flops

I'm missing my favorite flip flops and am nearly ready to offer a reward for their return.

They look kind of like this, but this is the newer version.  I'd be perfectly happy with my old, comfy pair.

They've been missing for about a week, and my feet just haven't been the same without them.  I don't have a particular loyalty to the brand, but when you find something that makes your feet this happy...

About a year ago this same pair of flip flops survived being dumped in the Green River on a rafting trip and made it back to my feet.  I was so happy to see them at the end of our river trip!

This same pair of flip flops also happens to fit 3 of the 4 females in the family, so I share a lot when we're away from home and they need an extra pair of shoes. (I told you I take them everywhere...and I've already checked the closets of the daughters who like to share my shoes...nothing.)

Have you ever tried to replace shoes you love?  You just can't.  I know they're just flip flops, but I'm hoping they come back to me soon.  I saw a client wearing the same exact pair earlier this week and I almost ripped them off her feet.  (I took pity on her and let her keep them because she is pregnant...and I'm pretty sure it's against best practice guidelines for a therapist to rip shoes off a client's feet.)

If you see me smiling later, it may mean my flip flops and I have been reunited...or I got over it.  Hopefully the former.

Just Me and My Boy Scouts--Rated PG-13

My boys rock at Boy Scouts.  I have the pins to prove it.  I've never quite figured out though why I get the pins when they get rank advancements.  I always say they need to pin them on Tim because he works so hard with them, but they're called "mother's pins," so I get the honor.

A few pictures of my Boy Scouts trying to pin on the mother's pins at recent Court of Honor:

Jeran started by pinning the pin up near my shoulder (watch out ladies...he'll be pinning a flower on your daughters in a matter of years).

Then Nate followed Jeran.  Apparently my shoulder is the "safe zone."




In a few weeks these same boys will be attending a scout leadership training camp where they will be required to wear the full scout uniform during official meetings.  Today the lucky job of taking them to the scout store to buy the uniforms fell on me.

They tried on pants (torture for boys).

They tried on pants again (just to make sure they had the right size...double torture)

Then they tried on pants a 3rd time after we bought them because the pants come unhemmed and the cashier told me they could size the boys and someone would come pick up the pants, hem them, and all I had to do was pick them up in a few days.  It was like she'd told me I just won a vacation and spa treatment.  Done!  (Except for convincing my boys to put the pants on again because they had already been tortured enough!)

Then we got back in the car for what might have been an uneventful ride home...except it was me and my boy scouts and things are never super uneventful when we're all together.

Somehow the subject went from boy scouts to a conversation they had with dad a few weeks ago about the females in the family.  I'll spare all of you (and them) the details but let's just say dad used a word the boys didn't understand, so the boys decided to "ask ChaCha" what it meant.  (For those who don't know, you can text ChaCha any question and ChaCha will answer.  Personally, I've found it useful a few times.  If I don't know something I'll say to my kids, "Ask ChaCha."  And once when we were meeting with an adoption agency representative about Gabby's paperwork and we had a question she couldn't answer, ChaCha came through for us...score one for teen sons and technology.)

But back to the story...  Gaining information about sensitive biological issues from ChaCha?  I must have been neglecting my parental duty.

So I started to explain...probably one of those times the boys weren't sure if they really loved having a very honest and descriptive mom.

I knew I'd said too much when I started hearing, "La, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la...." from the back seat and looked back to see one of my boy scouts with hands over his ears.

But I can bet we'll all laugh about our day for years to come...

And I'll try not to be too hurt that they thought to ask ChaCha but didn't ask me...

And I'll be glad that ChaCha was technical enough in it's response that they still needed a mom.

And I promise not to make them try on any more clothes, at least until August.

And for more humor...  I'd almost forgotten about this older post, but I promise if you read you won't be disappointed!

Sunday Sharing

My yellow roses are blooming this week.  I love these flowers.  

...Not because they're my favorite flower.  They're actually kind of a pain to care for (just like my mom told me they would be).  

But I love what they represent.  Lately, I smell them in bloom whenever walk past them, and the smell instantly takes me back to being a kid, visiting my grandma.  During the summer these fragrant blooms covered entire north side of my grandma's front porch, and I'd pick them just to keep the smell with me.  All these many years later, that smell and the sight of my wild yellow roses is an instant trip down memory lane.  

And I am proud to say the bushes in my front yard actually originated from my grandma's own wild yellow roses.  My mom got her starts from my grandma, and several years ago when we bought this house I got my starts from my mom.

I'm not sure where I'm going with this.  These kinds of connections to family are more than a trip down memory lane.  They're permanent and lasting, and for me, my own wild yellow roses represent those connections.

I love this quote:  "Every human being who comes to this earth is the product of generations of parents.  We have a natural desire to connect with our ancestors.  This desire dwells in our heart, regardless of age."  (Russell M. Nelson, "Generations Linked in Love")

What a great truth.  As a mother to children who are adopted, I know the desire to remain connected to roots does dwell in the hearts of these very young human beings, and when I see other adoptive families struggle against those feelings, I want to say, "Do you know you're struggling against the very forces of nature?"  

These connections are real.

As real as a whiff of the scent of a flower blooming in my front yard.

As real as desire to reach out across days and miles to family members who are far away...

...And across generations of eternity to ancestors I haven't met, but love because my life is the product of those generations.

Thank goodness for roots.

And connections.

And God, who gave us both.

(Go here or here for more on searching family roots.)

Seven...

At some point this afternoon Nate named everyone in the family after this bunch:

Why not?  There are seven of us.

Gabby and Jeran actually inspired the naming process:  

Jeran was Grumpy...he had a lot on his to-do list for the day, and was frustrated that no one else wanted to move as quickly as he was moving...but usually he doesn't fall into the Grumpy category.

Gabby was Sleepy.  After sleeping outside last night, she played a great last soccer game of the season (that girl can kick!), then came home and found her sleeping bag and collapsed right in the middle of the living room floor:

Two hours later she woke up (something about a spray bottle and brothers...)

She walked in the kitchen right as Nate was naming everyone after dwarfs.  He said,  "And I can be..."  

When he paused, Gabby didn't miss her opportunity.  "Dopey?"  Apparently being sprayed while she was sleeping didn't sit well with her.  

Surprisingly, Nate went with it...

Megan was Bashful (because she wouldn't talk in French...fear of losing points for talking).

Joie started off as Happy but in the next 10 minutes when everyone else had enough of the exaggerated happy mood, the name got switched to Hyper...and Pest.

Tim was Doc (I think I should have been Doc...fits my profession better), and I was Sneezy (because looking at the sun makes me sneeze).

Now if only we had a Snow White.  The house is a mess!

And a little off subject, but in honor of Gabby's last game of the season, I need to share this photo:

If there was a contest to find the most loved soccer ball, this ball would win.

Just to recap the Adventures of Gabby's Soccer Ball:

There was the excitement of a new ball...

A game between big brother and little sister

And surviving the weather.

This ball has seen it all and was officially retired to the trash this afternoon.

Megan still has a few games left in her season (more weather cancellations than Gabby) and her team will be moving to competition soccer in the fall.  

And some kind of fun news:  Megan and her friend will be helping to coach Gabby's team in the fall.  Wahoo!  

Are They Sleeping?

It's now 10: 28 p.m. and this is what I just left outside...

First time sleeping in a tent

Joie and Sydney:  Not much sleeping going on...the empty pillow is Megan''s spot.

Nate, whose face shall remain hidden

Jeran and Jordan...I'm pretty sure Jeran is faking it.

But only a few minutes later:

Maybe it was the 2 hour hike today?

Or helping a friend load rocks?

Or the bike ride to the park?

Most definitely there has been no shortage of fun around here the past few days.  

Update:  It's 10:38 p.m. and I just stuck my head in the tent.  It was totally silent.  Wow.  Piece of cake.

All I had to say was anyone who talks gets to sleep in their bed.  But honestly I can't take credit.  I think it was actually the nosy neighbor who motivated the silence.  When her back light came on they were quiet.  She's ruthless...known to call police over snowball fights and noise ordinance infractions (which kicks in at 10:00 p.m.)

The past two days we've had cousins (Jordan and Sydney) here while their parents are on an anniversary trip.  They weren't here even an hour and they were out the door to find fun:

(Pictures compliments of Nate during a bike ride to the very deserted school playground...fun!)

There was also longboarding yesterday (Megan saved her birthday money and babysitting money and bought a used one from online classifieds.)  

And night games last night.

And another bike ride this morning.

And a hike this afternoon...  Some friends also came along for the hike so it was me, eight kids, and three mountain bikes.  (And only one rattle snake.)  Thank you Mr. Kind Hiker who helped us avoid Mr. Snake.  We know it's inherent to venturing into the mountains this time of year, but we like to think they want to avoid us as much as we want to avoid them...  We hope.  

Joie and Gabby have decided they'll leave biking to the paved trails and hiking to the mountains.  Nate took a spill but survived.

Days like this make me love living this close to the mountains.  I didn't have a camera with me today, but this picture was taken from our front porch a few days ago...we hiked there today.

Check out those heavy storm clouds covering the mountain...but it was gorgeous today!

Plans for the summer:  A lot more of the same.  

(And now I think my fluffy, warm bed is calling me...so, so glad I'm not sleeping outside.  Bets on who will come in first?)

Breaking News: Tim Read Our Blog

Breaking

News

Yesterday Tim texted me from work and told me to approve his comment on his birthday post.  (Scroll down to the bottom of the link for comments.)

To be honest I expected sarcasm because of his anti-birthday mood, but was pleasantly surprised with sweetness...but actually I don't know why that is surprising, because everyone who knows Tim knows he's got an incredibly kind and sincere personality.  He's the kind of guy who would be there for anyone, a lot of times just because.


He read our blog one other time (that I know of), and left a long comment then also (again, scroll down to the bottom of the link for comments).

He got home late last night and couldn't stop talking about how incredible it was to read about all the memories and insights that were captured so honestly as we've journeyed down a sometimes difficult (but very rewarding) road.  He said read from the beginning of the blog to April 2009.  It must have been a really slow day for the FAA.

Our conversation took us on a trip down memory lane.  Family is what it's all about, and it felt good that my amazing husband is my most adoring fan.  (He said so himself.)

And since you're reading now, Tim:  Ij yokwe yuk.

Happy Birthday Tim!

I swore I wouldn't stop blogging when summer hit.  Obviously my commitment to summer is stronger than my commitment to blogging.

As of yesterday school is out...and I started a blog post about that yesterday but took the kids to a late night movie to celebrate the end of the school year instead of finishing the post.  ...Soon.

But first...

Happy Birthday Tim!

Today he turns...  Well, let's just say he'll always be older than I am.

He's in some kind of anti-birthday mood this year so he asked for nothing more than a hot dog cook out for his birthday.  He's eating healthy these days so he didn't eat the hot dogs, and just to balance things out I made some very healthy smoothies to go with the hot dogs.

But no cake.

Instead of cake we did this:

Honestly, I don't know which is worse for you...hot dogs or cake.  But if you don't eat it, I guess it doesn't matter either way.

Happy Birthday!

(And because we just can't resist dragging out these celebrations as long as possible, we'll celebrate again tomorrow when a niece and nephew come hang out with us for the weekend.  Just because we can.)

Sunday Sharing

I teach Gabby's class in primary at church.  Today's lesson was on The Ten Lepers, so gratitude has been on my mind today.

As the story goes, Jesus healed 10 people of leprosy, but only one returned to thank him (a Samaritan, and because Jesus was Jewish, this would have been socially taboo).  For a lot of reasons, giving thanks could have been overlooked by this individual, but it wasn't.

It's easy to fall into the trap of ingratitude.  We all get caught up in the importance of our own lives, forgetting that God is the source and strength of our lives.  I know I often find myself thinking of thanking someone, or feeling thankful, but getting side tracked with the seemingly important day-to-day things, and either forgetting or assuming people know I'm thankful.  There are times I often forget to give thanks, not just to God, but to others.  

In class today we talked about reasons why the "other nine" didn't return to thank Jesus.  There are a lot of possible reasons, but among the top answers given by the girls in my class was "they were so excited to be healed they forgot."

I'm sure the lepers felt thankful they were healed, but they were rushing off to share the amazing news with family, or rushing off to work, or to tell their friends.  Only one thought to "turn back" as the scriptures said, to give thanks.  The lepers had been told by Jesus to go show themselves to the priests and they would be made whole.  To give thanks would have meant returning to where they had encountered Jesus (or tracking him down again).  It took effort.  The leper who returned to give Jesus thanks had to go out of his way to return to Jesus to thank Him, which is the part that has been on my mind today. 

Giving thanks means I have usually have to leave what I'm doing...something busy, something fun, even things that are amazing and worthwhile, to give thanks.  It means not assuming people will know, or remembering to thank someone next time I'm thinking about it, but finding a way to say "thank you" right then.

I'm going to challenge myself to try harder to remember and take the time to say "thank you," more than I do.  

When I was getting ready for my lesson, I found this great quote that sums it all up.  

“In becoming a whole person, the grateful leper was healed inside as well as on the outside.  That day nine lepers were healed skin deep, but only one had the faith to be made whole” (The Power to Heal from Within,” Ensign, May 1995, 13).

The Party

What an amazingly calm party.

This was the messiest moment...

Her friends made sure she got to wear a bit of her cake.

But other than that, there was just a lot of hanging out.  

There was some of this:

Mafia...in sunggies because it was chilly.

And some of this:

Watching movies

And a lot of this: 

And of course this:  

And they had planned this:

plus this:

(which equals s'mores)

But after all the cake and snacks no one was in the mood for s'mores...

Except Gabby, who had never roasted marshmallows before.

So we roasted marshmallows and she told me all about the stars...everything she had learned on her field trip to the planetarium last week.  Then she said, "Let's sing songs around the fire!"  (And I had to dig deep...all the way back to my campfire days to remember a few, but since she didn't know the songs I knew, we sang Justin Bieber songs instead.)

And because it was more fun to cook burn the marshmallows than it was to eat them (she was just posing above), and because it was fun to watch the marshmallows puff when she cooked them...

She wondered what it would look like to cook a whole bag of marshmallows all at once.

Fun!

(Try it sometime...We triple dog dare ya!)